Tubby bye-bye, inTIMinator. | The Born Again Rundown

From the Commissioner's Desk

Fellas. At 4 o'clock on Sunday the Tubbies led The inTIMinator 104 to 17, and Tim's late starters hadn't kicked off yet. It didn't matter. Sir Douglas the Sleeper hung 173 on him, the most anybody has scored this year and tied for the 2nd-most ever in the league. Crazy.

The lineup didn't matter anywhere on Sunday. Levi and Jason both started the best lineup they could have and both lost. Vanilla Don won with a 0 in his. The Ballers started 2 guys who scored 0 and won by 25. And Jeff left 43 points on his bench, started Penix anyway, and beat me by 12.

I don't think the 173 changes anything about Tim. The bye might: he's 4-1 with the most points in the league, and the first thing he gets after his first loss is a week without Gibbs, LaPorta or his kicker. Mr. Tryna 3peat scored 146 and gets the Tubbies next, so the 2 highest scores of the week are in the same game on Sunday.

Four Teletubbies stand over The inTIMinator, flat on his back in a leather jacket, while Nathan smiles behind them under a sign reading 173-124. — Hasta la vista, 4-0.

And you're picking games this week too.

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Week 5 Results

**Don 123** over **Levi 106**Vanilla Don · Josh Allen 41 · Sassy Balls · James Cook III 23
Levi's 106 would have beaten 4 teams this week. Don wasn't one of them.

**Jeff 111** over **Jalan 99**Little Isaacs · Michael Penix Jr. 27 · Open On Sundays · Jared Goff 42
Goff gave me 42. My other 8 starters gave me 57.
Me when I see Blake Corum running for more than 5 yards and then losing to Jeff by 12.

**Matt 126** over **David 114**Rivendell Rangers · Trevor Lawrence 38 · De'Coldest Toevadoit · C.J. Stroud 35
A 57-yard field goal at the horn won it in London, and that's 3 straight for Rivendell.

**Eric 146** over **Jason 89**Phatty Daddy · Jordan Love 44 · Foxes Running In A Field · Matthew Stafford 47
Love and Watson hooked up for 2 touchdowns and Phatty Daddy won by 57. Stafford gave the Foxes 47, and everybody else gave them 42.

**Bobby & Steve 97** over **Josiah 72**The Aging Ballers · Joe Burrow 32 · No Punt Intended · Jalen Hurts 25
Harvey and Fannin were the zeros, both on the field. Our Bama boy lost Addison before kickoff and got 1 catch out of Tate.

**Nathan 173** over **Tim 124**The Teletubbies · Drake Maye 57 · The inTIMinator · Jacoby Brissett 36
Tim's 124 was the 4th-highest score of the week, and it lost by 49.

Title Odds

20,000 simulated seasons say Tim. The Tubbies moved the most.

Biggest move: Nathan, 0.4% to 4.5% in one Sunday. Biggest drop: Tim, 53.8% to 47.7%, and nobody else is above 14.6.

1. Tim The inTIMinator · 4-1 · playoffs 98.4%
40.7%▼ 7
2. Eric Phatty Daddy · 3-2 · playoffs 91.8%
19.3%▲ 4.7
3. Matt Rivendell Rangers · 3-2 · playoffs 89.5%
15.1%▲ 4.5
4. Don Vanilla Don · 4-1 · playoffs 75.3%
8.2%▼ 2.4
5. David De'Coldest Toevadoit · 2-3 · playoffs 65.5%
7.2%▲ 3.3
6. Bobby & Steve The Aging Ballers · 4-1 · playoffs 53.6%
3.1%▼ 2.4
7. Nathan The Teletubbies · 2-3 · playoffs 30.9%
2.2%▼ 2.3
8. Josiah No Punt Intended · 3-2 · playoffs 50.9%
2%▲ 1.2
9. Levi Sassy Balls · 1-4 · playoffs 14.4%
<1%▲ 0.4
10. Jeff Little Isaacs · 2-3 · playoffs 18.7%
<1%▲ 0.3
11. Jalan Open On Sundays · 1-4 · playoffs 10.2%
<1%▼ 0.2
12. Jason Foxes Running In A Field · 1-4 · playoffs 0.6%
0%▼ 0.1

Three Things

The 173

The Tubbies Tubbied.

The Tubbies had lost 3 straight and hadn't scored 100 since Week 1. Then Maye threw 4 touchdowns and Warren scored twice from 50 yards or more, and the 297 points in that game are the most ever in one game in the league.

I said I'd wait until October to say whether Nathan is good. He has more points than the 4-1 Ballers, so yes. The 64 and the 80 were him too.

Record 2-3Points 544All-play 22-33

The first loss

He'll be back.

Brissett started for Lamar, Gibbs ran for 151, and none of it mattered after 4 o'clock.

The loss took 6 points off his title odds and left him the favorite by a mile. The bye week is the bigger problem, and Lamar missed the start of Wednesday's practice with Schefter reporting a realistic chance he plays Sunday.

Record 4-1Points 695All-play 51-4

Quietly 4-1

Vanilla Don, 4-1 with a 0 in the lineup.

4-1, the 2nd seed, and the 4th-most points in the league, with Allen, Mahomes and Rodgers all still on the roster. Two of the wins were blowouts, one was by 2, and the only loss was the 74.

Nobody's talking about Mr. Vanilla himself, and this week he gets David's roster without its kicker or its defense.

Record 4-1Points 559All-play 31-24

Weekly Superlatives

High Score. Nathan, 173
Tim's 158 from Week 1 was the old high.
Low Score. Josiah, 72
Lloyd's 15 sat on the bench.
Closest Game. Jeff over Jalan by 12
Nothing else was close.
Biggest Blowout. Eric over Jason by 57
Phatty by 57. As always, Jason stinks.
Should Have Started Him. Bobby & Steve sat Mike Evans (19)
Juwan Johnson started ahead of him and scored 1.
Luckiest Win. Bobby & Steve won with 97
The Ballers' 97 would have lost to 9 teams.
Toughest Loss. Tim lost with 124
Brissett and Gibbs showed up. So did the 173.
Waiver Pickup of the Week. Jacoby Brissett, 36 for Tim
Claimed for nothing last Wednesday.
Lineup of the Week. Levi, 100% of the best lineup
Levi got 106 out of 106 and lost by 17.
Manager of the Week. Don. Allen over Rodgers.
Rodgers threw 3 touchdowns on the bench. Don started Allen anyway, and Allen ran for 121 on Monday night. That's the call.

Season count

Through Week 5.

Award	Season tally
High Score	Tim 3 · Don 1 · Nathan 1
Low Score	Jeff 2 · Don 1 · Jason 1 · Josiah 1
Closest Game	Don 1 · Eric 1 · Jeff 1 · Josiah 1 · Levi 1
Biggest Blowout	Don 2 · Eric 2 · Tim 1
Should Have Started Him	Bobby & Steve 1 · Eric 1 · Jalan 1 · Jeff 1 · Josiah 1
Luckiest Win	Josiah 3 · Bobby & Steve 1 · Don 1
Toughest Loss	Jalan 1 · Jeff 1 · Levi 1 · Matt 1 · Tim 1
Waiver Pickup of the Week	Matt 2 · Jeff 1 · Tim 1
Lineup of the Week	David 1 · Jalan 1 · Jason 1 · Josiah 1 · Levi 1
Manager of the Week	Bobby & Steve 1 · Don 1 · Jason 1 · Josiah 1 · Nathan 1

Standings

Three teams at every record from 4-1 down to 1‑4.

All-play is your record if you played all 11 other teams every week: this week first, then the season.

Team	Record	PF	PA	All-play Wk 5	All-play Season
1. TimThe inTIMinator	4-1	695	553	8-3-0	51-4-0
2. DonVanilla Don	4-1	559	425	7-4-0	31-24-0
3. Bobby & SteveThe Aging Ballers	4-1	515	423	2-9-0	25-29-1
4. EricPhatty Daddy	3-2	596	535	10-1-0	37-18-0
5. JosiahNo Punt Intended	3-2	450	448	0-11-0	15-39-1
6. MattRivendell Rangers	3-2	576	516	9-2-0	35-20-0
7. NathanThe Teletubbies	2-3	544	589	11-0-0	22-33-0
8. DavidDe'Coldest Toevadoit	2-3	544	541	6-5-0	27-28-0
9. JeffLittle Isaacs	2-3	460	529	5-6-0	17-38-0
10. JalanOpen On Sundays	1-4	514	608	3-8-0	28-27-0
11. LeviSassy Balls	1-4	492	556	4-7-0	25-30-0
12. JasonFoxes Running In A Field	1-4	447	669	1-10-0	16-39-0

Josiah sits above Matt at 3-2 on head-to-head: he beat him 95-88 in Week 2.

Commish Power Rankings

Complaints go in the group text.

1. Tim • The inTIMinator · 4-1 · 139.0 ppg · all-play 51-44-1 with 695 points, 139 a week.
2. Eric • Phatty Daddy · 3-2 · 119.2 ppg · all-play 37-18Mr. Tryna 3peat has the 2nd-most points in the league, and the Tubbies next.
3. Matt • Rivendell Rangers · 3-2 · 115.2 ppg · all-play 35-20Rivendell has 576 points, 3rd in the league, and nobody on bye.
4. Don • Vanilla Don · 4-1 · 111.8 ppg · all-play 31-244-1 and the 2nd seed. The quarterback program survives at 3.
5. David ▲1 De'Coldest Toevadoit · 2-3 · 108.8 ppg · all-play 27-282-3 with 544 for and 541 against. The 3 losses are by 25, 8 and 12.
6. Bobby & Steve ▼1 The Aging Ballers · 4-1 · 103.0 ppg · all-play 25-29-14-1, 4 straight, none closer than 18.
7. Nathan ▲3 The Teletubbies · 2-3 · 108.8 ppg · all-play 22-332-3 with 589 points against, the 2nd-most in the league.
8. Jalan ▼1 Open On Sundays · 1-4 · 102.8 ppg · all-play 28-271-4 on the schedule, 28-27 against everybody.
9. Levi • Sassy Balls · 1-4 · 98.4 ppg · all-play 25-301-4, and Jalan on Sunday.
10. Jeff ▲2 Little Isaacs · 2-3 · 92.0 ppg · all-play 17-382-3 with 460 points, 10th in the league, and 17-38 in all-play.
11. Josiah ▼3 No Punt Intended · 3-2 · 90.0 ppg · all-play 15-39-13-2 with 450 points and a 15-39-1 all-play. In the top 6 anyway.
12. Jason ▼1 Foxes Running In A Field · 1-4 · 89.4 ppg · all-play 16-391-4 with 669 points against. Nobody else is over 610.

You Paid How Much?!

$73 moved Wednesday morning, and $35 of it went to a running back on a bye.

Waiver, $35: Samaje Perine, $35 — Perine out-carried Chase Brown 14 to 13 in Miami, ran for 68 yards and caught a touchdown, and Brown fumbled a swing pass near the goal line. Jeff dropped Kamara to get him, with the Bengals on bye, and has $35 left.

Waiver, $30: Germie Bernard, $30 — A rookie in his first start, 6 catches for 80 yards against the Colts, with Michael Pittman on injured reserve and Roman Wilson out a couple of weeks with a finger. Matt dropped Devaughn Vele and has $28 left. Pittsburgh is at Tampa on Sunday.

Free agent, $0: Michael Penix Jr., $0 — Added last Thursday with Bryce on bye. Threw for 240 and a touchdown against the Ravens on Sunday night. Jeff has started 3 different quarterbacks in 5 weeks and won with 2 of them.

Free agent, $0: T.J. Hockenson, $0 — Levi added him last Thursday and dropped Darren Waller. On Sunday Hockenson's head hit the turf on the 2nd play, and he's in the concussion protocol with a bye to clear it.

The small change: Matt swapped Darnold for Winston and the Raiders defense for the Jets, $1 each. Eric took Waller 5 days after Levi dropped him, and a Giants kicker. Jalan paid $5 for Dameon Pierce and $1 for the Chiefs defense, dropping Shipley and Roman Wilson. Last week Matt added Mike Washington Jr. and the Ballers added Malik Washington. $406 has moved this season.

Around the League

Lamar Jackson walking on the field in a purple uniform — BaltimoreLamar sat out Wednesday. Sunday is a realistic chance.
Ruled out Friday with the ankle, and Tyler Huntley beat Atlanta in overtime on a 1-yard run. He wasn't on the field when Wednesday's practice opened, and Schefter reports a realistic chance he plays at Cleveland anyway. Huntley would start again if not. Photo: ESPN (Logan Bowles/Getty Images)

Michael Penix Jr. on the sideline with a towel over his head — Atlanta and WashingtonPenix hurt his ribs. Daniels ran for 103.
Penix took a rib shot late in the 4th quarter Sunday night and Tua finished the overtime loss. Schefter says it's not considered serious, and Penix practiced in full Wednesday. Daniels, back from the elbow in a brace, ran for 103 and 2 touchdowns in a 27-27 tie with the Giants. He plays Monday night at San Francisco, then Washington has its bye. Photo: ESPN (Kevin C. Cox/Getty Images)

Deebo Samuel catching a pass in a white 49ers uniform — San FranciscoDeebo is out at least a couple of weeks
A hamstring in the 3rd quarter in Seattle, 2 catches for 21 before it. Shanahan said Monday it's at least a couple of weeks, and the 49ers' bye is Week 8. Tim's roster is thin for the first time this year. Photo: ESPN (Steven Bisig/Imagn Images)

Marvin Harrison Jr. running with the ball in a red Cardinals uniform — HoustonMarvin Harrison Jr. is a Texan
Arizona traded him to Houston for a 2027 2nd-round pick and a 7th, with a 6th coming back, and the Texans finished the deal Monday. He goes from Brissett to Stroud. Levi picked him up for nothing in September. Photo: ESPN (Sam Hodde/Getty Images)

The Injury Report

Deebo Samuel (Tim)Hamstring. Out a couple of weeks, Shanahan says.
TreVeyon Henderson (Jason)High ankle sprain. Schefter said weeks on Monday, then the Patriots listed him limited on Wednesday. In doubt for the Jets.
David Montgomery (Nathan)Groin. Week to week, and likely out in London.
Baker Mayfield (Nathan)Thumb. Not expected back this week; Jalon Daniels starts again.
T.J. Hockenson (Levi)Concussion on the 2nd play Sunday. In the protocol, with a bye to clear it.
Kyle Monangai (Levi)Turf toe, in a walking boot. Week to week.
Breece Hall (David)Quad. Week to week, and Glenn wouldn't say more.
Josh Jacobs (Don)He isn't hurt. He has been on the commissioner's exempt list since August, a suspension is possible, and LaFleur had no update Monday.

Lamar Jackson (Tim)Ankle. Wasn't on the field when Wednesday's practice opened. Schefter: a realistic chance for Sunday.
Saquon Barkley (Jeff)Hamstring. Didn't play in London. Sirianni is hopeful for Carolina.
Michael Penix (Jeff)Ribs. Practiced in full Wednesday and is expected to start against the Bears. Tua if not.
CeeDee Lamb (Jason)Bruised quad. Practiced in full Wednesday.
DJ Moore (Don)Shoulder. Sat Monday night. A coin flip for Las Vegas.
Caleb Williams (David)Hamstring. Full on Wednesday's walkthrough report, and Johnson still hasn't named his starter for Atlanta.
Jaxon Smith-Njigba (David)Ankle. Taped it and finished with 102 and a score. Limited on the estimated reports before Thursday.
Quinshon Judkins (Josiah)Ankle. Out of the boot, but didn't practice Wednesday. Day to day.
DeVonta Smith (Tim)Hamstring. Sirianni is hopeful.
Ladd McConkey (Nathan)Foot. Active Sunday, 0 snaps. Harbaugh says he could work back in this week.
Rashee Rice (Jason)Hamstring. The reports disagree, and the bye is over.
Jordan Addison (Josiah)Hamstring. Inactive Sunday after a pregame workout. Bye, then Week 7.

Bye, Bye, Bye Week

Bengals, Lions, Dolphins and Vikings are off, and 10 of the 12 rosters feel it.

See you in Week 7. Tap for sound.

Bengals

Lions

Dolphins

Vikings

Jalan 5 on bye: Chase Brown (RB), Tee Higgins (WR), Jared Goff (QB), Bengals D/ST (D/ST), Ollie Gordon II (RB)
Bobby & Steve 4 on bye: Ja'Marr Chase (WR), Joe Burrow (QB), Vikings D/ST (D/ST), Malik Washington (WR)
Josiah 3 on bye: Amon-Ra St. Brown (WR), Jordan Addison (WR), Evan McPherson (K)
Tim 3 on bye: Jahmyr Gibbs (RB), Sam LaPorta (TE), Jake Bates (K)
David 2 on bye: Will Reichard (K), Lions D/ST (D/ST)
Jason 2 on bye: Kyler Murray (QB), Aaron Jones Sr. (RB)
Jeff 2 on bye: Jameson Williams (WR), Samaje Perine (RB)
Nathan 2 on bye: Mike Gesicki (TE), Justin Jefferson (WR)
Don 1 on bye: Dohnte Meyers (WR)
Levi 1 on bye: T.J. Hockenson (TE)

Bye Week 7: Bills, Jaguars, Chargers and Commanders.

Studs, Duds and Benches

Drake Maye, 57 points.374 yards and 4 touchdowns, plus a 3-yard run. The most any quarterback has scored in the league this season.
Matthew Stafford, 47 points.383 yards and 3 touchdowns on 54 throws, and the Rams lost in overtime on a blocked kick.
Jordan Love, 44 points.367 yards and a 2-point pass. The touchdowns went 42 and 53 yards, both to Watson.
Jared Goff, 42 points.271 yards and 3 touchdowns, plus a sneak, in a blowout in Arizona. On bye this week.
Josh Allen, 41 points.A touchdown run and a 2-point pass in an overtime win Monday night.
Trevor Lawrence, 38 points.331 yards and 2 scores in London. Matt is 2-0 since he started him over Darnold.
Jacoby Brissett, 36 points.292 yards and 3 touchdowns in a loss, sacked 5 times.
Jahmyr Gibbs, 32 points.25 carries and 2 touchdowns.
Jaylen Warren, 30 points.An 80-yard touchdown catch in the 1st quarter and a 50-yard touchdown run in the 3rd.
Bucky Irving, 29 points.165 rushing yards and 2 scores on Thursday night in Dallas.

Jayden Daniels, 43 points.Jeff's other quarterback, back from the elbow, and on the bench.
Aaron Rodgers, 32 points.3 touchdowns on Don's bench, 9 behind Allen. Don wins either way.
Kyler Murray, 30 points.229 yards and 51 on the ground, behind Stafford. Jason loses with either one.
Dak Prescott, 28 points.316 yards and 2 picks. 5th straight week on the Ballers' bench, 159 points sitting since September.
Packers D/ST, 21 points.3 interceptions and 4 sacks of a Bears offense that scored 7. Nathan started the 49ers, who had 26, and nobody noticed.
Mike Evans, 19 points.7 catches for 113 and a touchdown. The Ballers didn't need him.

CeeDee Lamb, 0 points.2 catches for 9 on Thursday, then a bruised quad and the locker room.
David Montgomery, 1 point.5 carries for 11 before the groin went.
Jeremiyah Love, 2 points.12 carries for 22 yards. A long run of 8.
Tee Higgins, 2 points.2 catches for 22, a week after the 157.
Dalton Kincaid, 2 points.1 catch for 7 yards. The points came on a 2-point conversion.
Cairo Santos, 1 point.Missed his only field goal, from 43. 1 extra point.
Chris Olave, 4 points.4 catches for 46 in a Saints offense that managed 13.

Week 6

Eric projected 125, Nathan projected 90, game of the week

Series: Eric leads 3-2 in the regular season; playoffs Nathan 1-0. Last meeting: Eric 121-88 (2025 Wk 8). Eric has won 3 straight.
Watch: Phatty has won 3 straight in this one, the last by 33 last October. Nathan goes at it without Jefferson and Gesicki, and ESPN has Eric by 35.

My pick: Eric

Series: Jalan leads 8-4 in the regular season; playoffs Jalan 2-1. Last meeting: Jalan 101-66 (2025 Wk 2). Jalan has won 2 straight.
Watch: Levi and I are both 1-4, and 4 of my starters are on bye. I've won the last 2 against him. ESPN has Levi by 18.

My pick: Jalan

Levi and me, 5 weeks into the hole, asking ESPN Fantasy for the day off. Tap for sound.

Series: Don leads 16-15 in the regular season; playoffs Don 2-1. Last meeting: David 116-101 (2025 Wk 7). David has won 2 straight.
Watch: David's won the last 2, and he plays this one with no kicker and no defense. Don on paper, by 27.

My pick: Don

Series: Jason leads 17-15 in the regular season; playoffs Jeff 1-0. Last meeting: Jason 89-73 (2025 Wk 12).
Watch: Jason won the last meeting in November. This week he's without Murray and Aaron Jones on bye, and Henderson is in doubt. Jason by 8 on the board.

My pick: Jeff

Matt projected 110, Bobby & Steve projected 100

Series: Regular-season series tied 8-8; playoffs the Ballers 2-2. Last meeting: Matt 84-47 (2025 Wk 13). Matt has won 3 straight.
Watch: Matt has taken 3 straight from the Ballers, 84-47 in the last one. Burrow and Chase are on bye, and the board has Matt on top by 9.

My pick: Matt

Series: Tim leads 4-3 in the regular season. Last meeting: Tim 125-104 (2025 Wk 5). Tim has won 2 straight.
Watch: Tim's won the last 2 meetings. The board says Josiah by 19.

My pick: Tim

My Picks

Picks: Eric vs Nathan: Eric; Levi vs Jalan: Jalan; David vs Don: Don; Jason vs Jeff: Jeff; Bobby vs Matt: Matt; Josiah vs Tim: Tim

Eric. I don't think the Tubbies do it twice.

Me. I'm not delusional. I'm taking myself anyway.

Don. 4-1, the 2nd seed, and I'm done doubting it.

Jeff. Jason minus 3 starters is a 1-4 team minus 3 starters.

Matt. Rivendell's last 3 scores all beat what the Ballers put up Sunday.

Tim. Lamar or no Lamar.

Reader Picks

Your turn.

Pick all 6 games right and the league office pays you $1 in FAAB. Picks lock when Seattle kicks off in Denver on Thursday night.

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Ledger of Weekly Picks

I'm 3 and 3 on last week's picks.

Matt over Davidpicked Matt · ✓ hit
Eric over Jasonpicked Eric · ✓ hit
Bobby & Steve over Josiahpicked Bobby · ✓ hit
Don over Levipicked Levi · ✗ miss
Jeff over Jalanpicked Jalan · ✗ miss
Nathan over Timpicked Tim · ✗ miss

Matt, Eric and the Ballers hit. I picked Levi, and Don won by 17. I picked myself, and Jeff won by 12. I picked Tim, and Nathan scored 173. I'm 17 and 13 on the year.

That's the Rundown. Pick wisely.

The offer is still $4 in FAAB for everybody if I ever go 6 for 6 on my picks in a given week. 3 for 6 this week. Nobody's getting paid. A perfect Reader Picks card pays $1.

Next Wednesday

Week 6, the wire, and the first Reader Picks graded.